Pappy
04-23-2004, 12:47 PM
being a newbie to the state, I was amused when I recieved this from my congressman.
Understanding WV:
Because of the misunderstandings that frequently develop when residents of other states pass through our state, in an effort to help outsiders understand WV, the folloing list will be handed to each driver entering our state:
1. That farm boy standing next to the feed bin did more work before breakfest then you do all week at the gym.
2. It;s called a 'gravelroad'! No matter how slow you drive, you're going to get dust on your Navigator. I have a 4 wheel drive because I need it...not to just keep up with the neighbors.
3. We all started hunting and fishing when we were 7 years old. Yeah , we saw Bambi. We got over it.
4. Any reference to "corn fed" when talking about our women will get you whipped....by our women!
5. Go ahead and bring your $600 Orvis Fly Rod. Dont cry to us if a flathead catfish breaks it off at the handle. We have a name for those little trout you fish for...BAIT!
6. Pull your pants up, you look like an idiot.
7. If your cell phone rings when a bunch of Mallard ducks are making thier final approach we will shoot it. You might hope you dont have it up to your ear at the time.
8. Thats right. Whisky is only 2 bucks. We can buy a fifth for what you paid in the airport for one drink.
9. No, there is NO "Vegatarian Special" on the menu. Order steak. Or you can order a chefs salad and pick off the 2 pounds of ham and turkey.
10. You bring Coke into my house it better be brown, wet and served over rice.
11. So you have a 60 thousand dollar car you drive on weekends. We have a quater million dollar combine that we use 2 weeks a year.
12. Let's get this straight. We have 2 stoplights in town. We stop when its red.
13. Our women hunt, fish and drive 4 whhelers, pick up trucks and tractors because they WANT to. So, your a feminest?. Aint that cute.
14. Yeah we eat catfish....and turtle. You really want sushi and caviar? It's available at the bait shop.
15. They are pigs. Thats what they smell like. Get over it. Dont like it? The interstate runs north ...use it!
16. The huntin season refers to the first week of deer season. Every thing is closed. Period.
17. So everyone in a pick up waves? Its called being friendly. Why cant you understand it?
18. That state trooper that pulled you over for driving like an idiot....his name is SIR no matter how old he is.
19. Some think we are Hillbillys. yep, that maybe right but we know that WV is a state.
Now ya'll enjoy your visit!
Understanding WV:
Because of the misunderstandings that frequently develop when residents of other states pass through our state, in an effort to help outsiders understand WV, the folloing list will be handed to each driver entering our state:
1. That farm boy standing next to the feed bin did more work before breakfest then you do all week at the gym.
2. It;s called a 'gravelroad'! No matter how slow you drive, you're going to get dust on your Navigator. I have a 4 wheel drive because I need it...not to just keep up with the neighbors.
3. We all started hunting and fishing when we were 7 years old. Yeah , we saw Bambi. We got over it.
4. Any reference to "corn fed" when talking about our women will get you whipped....by our women!
5. Go ahead and bring your $600 Orvis Fly Rod. Dont cry to us if a flathead catfish breaks it off at the handle. We have a name for those little trout you fish for...BAIT!
6. Pull your pants up, you look like an idiot.
7. If your cell phone rings when a bunch of Mallard ducks are making thier final approach we will shoot it. You might hope you dont have it up to your ear at the time.
8. Thats right. Whisky is only 2 bucks. We can buy a fifth for what you paid in the airport for one drink.
9. No, there is NO "Vegatarian Special" on the menu. Order steak. Or you can order a chefs salad and pick off the 2 pounds of ham and turkey.
10. You bring Coke into my house it better be brown, wet and served over rice.
11. So you have a 60 thousand dollar car you drive on weekends. We have a quater million dollar combine that we use 2 weeks a year.
12. Let's get this straight. We have 2 stoplights in town. We stop when its red.
13. Our women hunt, fish and drive 4 whhelers, pick up trucks and tractors because they WANT to. So, your a feminest?. Aint that cute.
14. Yeah we eat catfish....and turtle. You really want sushi and caviar? It's available at the bait shop.
15. They are pigs. Thats what they smell like. Get over it. Dont like it? The interstate runs north ...use it!
16. The huntin season refers to the first week of deer season. Every thing is closed. Period.
17. So everyone in a pick up waves? Its called being friendly. Why cant you understand it?
18. That state trooper that pulled you over for driving like an idiot....his name is SIR no matter how old he is.
19. Some think we are Hillbillys. yep, that maybe right but we know that WV is a state.
Now ya'll enjoy your visit!